The factory is closed..

Being a teacher is a LOT of work. Honestly.

I've known this..but it's really starting to hit home the more I become actively involved in the classroom.
There is just SO much to manage, and teach, and remember...and...control.
I love it, but sometimes I wonder if I can actually do it.

I keep reminding myself that if it's something God has called me to (which I'm sure it is) then He will equip me for it.

I taught my first "real" lesson in there today other than opening. I taught reading and I'll be teaching it probably the rest of the time I'm there.

It went okay.

Reading is an hour long, and let me just say, it's hard to plan and KNOW how much time stuff will take. Especially since it's my first time teaching these kids and from this specific curriculum.

I know I could have been better prepared, and been to school earlier than I was...but overall I guess it wasn't TOO bad for my first lesson. I did sort of run out of things for the kids to do though...whoops..(there were about 10-15 minutes remaining..) Hopefully it will just get better from here. I keep reminding myself that I'm still just learning and I won't learn without actually experiencing teaching.

My devotional this morning was SO perfect. I was feeling nervous about the lesson, and just the fact that it was Monday and I had questions about my lesson for my coop and I wasn't 100% sure about things.

My devotional said: I AM YOUR STRENGTH AND SHIELD. I plan out each day and have it ready for you, long before you arise from bed. I also provide the strength you need each step of the way. Instead of assessing your energy level and wondering about what's on the road ahead, concentrate on staying in touch with Me... Whenever you start to feel afraid, remember that I am your Shield.

:) Looooove this SO much.

It also listed this verse:

7The Lord is my Strength and my [impenetrable] Shield; my heart trusts in, relies on, and confidently leans on Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song will I praise Him.
Psalm 28:7 :)

...and now I will end with a cute HILARIOUS story.

One of my first graders had a birthday recently and my teacher does something special for them. Well she got to pick a few friends and have lunch with the teacher.
My teacher was talking with them all about new babies bc one of the little girls is about to have a new brother. My teacher was asking each of them if they wanted a new baby brother or sister, and the little girl who's birthday it was yelled "MY MOM'S FACTORY IS CLOSED..!!!"
...baaahahahah. I almost didn't know how that related and thought she was being random...and then by the look on my teacher's face I realized she wasn't.
HA!
The end.

=)

(SNOW day again TOMORROW?!?)

God is LOVE

1. If my house were on fire, and I could only grab 3 things, I would grab... My Bible, my iphone, and the next one that came to my head was my pillow..haah which seems kind of silly. Either pillow or pictures for the last one, BUT it depends which house I'm at.

2. A smell I really like is... I LOVE the smell of a camp fire, fire place, or leaves burning. I have no idea why, but it's the best smell in the world to me..! :) I also like clean sheets, and winter-candy apple scent from bath and body works ;)

3. Something you might not know about me is... I'm not at all a "sports" kind of person by any means, (I'm just not good/interested in playing most sports..) but when I was around 10 and 11 I played softball on a community team, and loved it. (..I was also a girl scout, and a "dancer" hehe)

4. Some of my favorite websites to putter about on are... Blogger, Etsy..and I'd be lying if I didn't say facebook, unfortunately.

5. This weekend I will... Write lots and LOTS of lesson plans, sleep, relax, watch ALIAS (I'm on the second season, it's SO good!), maybe see some friends. :)

6. Nothing makes me happier than... Hearing from God, and feeling God's love, comfort and peace. Anything related to God, basically. Love makes me really happy inside too..:) But God is love...so that makes sense..;)

Happy weekend to all!

Scripture for a snow day

19Again I tell you, if two of you on earth agree (harmonize together, make a symphony together) about whatever [anything and everything] they may ask, it will come to pass and be done for them by My Father in heaven.

20For wherever two or three are gathered (drawn together as My followers) in (into) My name, there I AM in the midst of them.

Matthew 18:19-20

I love these couple of verses. I'm reading a new book that I actually got for Christmas LAST year. It's called wrestling prayer.


I haven't gotten too far yet, but so far it's about how very powerful prayer is and how there is real power in it for those who have faith in Jesus. :)

It also lists James 5:16 and I love it in the amplified version:

16Confess to one another therefore your faults (your slips, your false steps, your offenses, your sins) and pray [also] for one another, that you may be healed and restored [to a spiritual tone of mind and heart]. The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working].

It doesn't say...IF you should slip up or sin or IF you have faults...it says to confess these things..because it happens to ALL of us.
The wording of this verse was reassuring to me. :)

Feeling defeated

I'm feeling pretty frustrated right now.

I can't even put it to words exactly but I feel like I'm a bad person, and student teacher or something for not making it to school these past couple of days. :(

Yesterday was completely out of my control, my car broke, there wasn't anything I could do about that.

I ended up not going in today either because of the snow.
In case you're asking yourself...the answer is No, my school was not closed this morning during out flippin "WINTER STORM watch"...it was OPEN.

I tried my best to suck up my nerves and leave the house anyway, despite my best judgement.
I cleared my car and shoveled off the driveway. I then went back in the house to put on my nice clothes for school and by the time I came back out, my windows were basically covered again because the snow was really coming down.
The roads were really awful. The radio person kept saying "the roads are treacherous".
I tried not to think about how bad they were, but every time I tried to break I was sliding, which might not bother some but it SCARES the heck out of me not to have control of my car.
My school is 45-50 minutes away on a normal day, and some of the roads are farm ones, and highways. I was literally crying at the thought of driving all the way out there when I didn't even feel comfortable driving in Millersville. I called my mom, and as stupid as I feel admitting this, I was crying on the phone with her because of how stupid I felt the situation was. WHY am I risking getting in an accident, (which I'm certain I would have) just to get to school, have them dismiss early and have to drive back??

I called my supervisor, and she said to talk to my coop about it. I then set out to drive back home. It was SO bad. I was scared for my life. The roads were covered, and everyone was sliding. The worst part was that I felt like I was hyperventilating and I was getting some panic attack feelings in my hands/arms. :( It was NO fun.

ANYWAY, I didn't make it school.

I feel so defeated almost.

I felt GOOD earlier, that I made it home, and that I was safe and didn't need to drive...buuut I'm starting to feel kind of judged..? Almost like certain people think I just didn't even try, or like I didn't WANT to go. But honestly I was concerned for my safety...honest to goodness.

I feel like a horrible person and like the worst student teacher ever right now. :(

It's not a good feeling.

There were certain things I was supposed to observe that I didn't get to, and certain things I was supposed to teach, but I couldn't.

I feel like a failure.

=/

What. A. Day.

Today was a crazy, crazy day.

I'm not sure why these crazy, "out of the ordinary typical day" things keep happening to me, but today was another one of those days.

I was on my way to school this morning, I had been driving for about 20-25 minutes and I noticed that the needle that gages the temperature in the car's engine kept rising. I was getting worried and then it reached the H all the way at the top where the red part is. I thought to myself "...this can't be good" so I pulled over on the side of the road. (A highway, mind you) My car was smoking and I was so scared, and had no clue what to do. Just a quick recap, the day before my heat would NOT work for a long time, and I smelled something like maple syrup, and mentioned something to my mom because it was so odd, so I WAS on the lookout for my car being weird this morning
It turns out that maple syrup smell was the anti-freeze and that's why my heat wouldn't work.
So back to the highway- I opened my hood and there were green puddles of anti-freeze all over, so great. I called my parents, and AAA. I then called school to tell them I would be late for sure. AAA took about an hour to show up, and let me tell you, God has a sense of humor-He really does.
During the hour I was sitting there my parents kept calling, and I finished listening to the sermon I had started on my way from the good ole ipod. I noticed after about a half hour a car pulled off the road behind me. I thought that was weird but felt safe as long as he kept his distance. Well wouldn't you know he comes walking up to my car. I opened the door and he told me he was apparently having car troubles as well. He wanted to use my cell phone bc he didn't have one... I was so nervous he would like run away with my phone or something and the battery was already running low. He made one call which his people didn't answer, and I felt so awkward. THEN this VAN comes up behind me, and he said he was having trouble too. It was WEIRD, and what are the odds seriously..? I felt like God just wanted me to laugh at this situation because it was so peculiar. THEN AAA calls me back and tells me the vehicle they sent out to get me broke down, HA HA. Like whaaat?? That happens?! So they sent another one out.

Oh boy, it was a long time waiting, but it didn't feel as long as it was.

Eventually I called the school back and told them I wouldn't make it in at all. (I was super bummed :( ) I also called my supervisor to let her know what was going on. She was SO, SO nice to me. She even offered to pick me up at wherever the tow truck took me and drive me back home. I was SO grateful and it was SUCH a blessing! All the AAA people I talked to were SUPER nice also, which made everything so much easier. The school was understanding as well.

So later AAA towed me to the car dealer and I waited there for quite some time. It wasn't so bad because there were comfy seats and a TV with the news. There were about 4 or 5 other people in the waiting room and out of nowhere this guy looks over at me and starts talking to me about the news story that was on. haha. It just made me smile, like no one else was talking but here this random guy decides to talk to ME. It just reminded me how much I LOVE people. Everyone is so different and I love how some people just talk to complete strangers like they know them. He ended up leaving another half hour later and he even said bye to me. It just made me smile.

Eventually I did make it home, and I never made it to school today. I'm so thankful for all that God did today and that He was with me all day, once again. He just keeps showing up and giving me strength in the most bizarre situations. He just keeps showing me that He IS here. Always. Always.
It was frustrating that I had to be home even though I was seemingly fine, and I had planned to be at school....but sometimes things change.

By some miracle they actually were able to FIX my car today and I got to pick it up tonight, praise JESUS!!! :)
It did cost a lot of money though =/ The radiator broke.

I did talk to a girl tonight that student teaches at the same school and she comes from the same area. I told her I DID end up getting my car back, but asked if she might want to carpool anyway sometime to save gas. She sounded all for it, so that's something good that came out of today!

God is GOOD all the time. :)

In-service day

Today was my first in-service day EVER! It's crazy to think that in all the time I will spend with my life as a teacher, that today was my very first in-service. (hopefully out of many, many in-services.) :)

It was another really great day! I brought a ton of work to do and I was SO productive. I even surprised myself..! I got done a huge chunk of my TWS (teacher work sample). I'm teaching a science unit on matter and I got all the learning goals and objectives done as well as the whole assessment plan. :) I was happy. It was a nice day to interact with some of the other staff as well. I'm just starting to feel so comfortable there and I'm so thankful God has me at this school right now.

It is tough not having much time in the evenings. Boy, I'm so tired. I feel like I just got home and already it's time for bed! Welcome to the "real world" Kari...

As much as the in-service was actually kind of nice, I'm excited for the kiddos to be back tomorrow.

Also: I added another Bible verse for January! It's one of my favorites. :) Check it out.

Hebrews 13:5 Amplified

Everlasting Arms

Happy Sunday!
I normally wouldn't blog at Sunday at this time, but I have a little bit yet until it's time to leave for church and for some reason my fingers are "itching" to blog. haha.. I think I'm becoming slightly addicted.

Yesterday was a really good day! There was a scary incident that happened in the morning though. I was on my way to R&R at around 7:30ish and most of the road was well and safe, but there were some patches covered with snow/ice that had been blowing from the day before. (from all the flat farm lands) Well I was going about 50 mph, because honestly the roads didn't seem bad. All of a sudden though I hit a patch of snowy-icey-ness and my car started to skid. I was going so fast so I couldn't just slam on the break, but I was slowly applying it as I kept trying to right my car. I was swerving all over the place and then eventually my car did a 180 and completely turned around. It was terrifying. I was so close to going into the snow bank but luckily my car stopped just before. There were even some cars around but I didn't hit anybody! They stopped to let me turn back around.
You might be asking, and THIS is a good day?! But guys, GOD WAS SO WITH ME!!! I was a little shaken still once I got to the retreat but I was so amazed. God kept me and the other drivers around me safe. I didn't hit anybody or anything. I was shaken, but also kept quite calm (ONLY by God!!) I was completely okay, and God was with me through that entire situation!!! =) Praise Jesus!

The retreat was so good too. Jenny talked about weeds. (The weed of worry, want, and wealth in our lives) and how weeds and God both need the same sort of things to "grow" or take over. Like attention, and things of that nature. Those "weeds" don't stand a chance of growing and taking over our lives when we are spending our time/attention in God and keeping faith. Also spending time in His word is crucial.

Aside from the fantastic message I also got to see some lovely ladies who I LOVE so much. :) It was wonderful.

Afterwards Amanda and I went to pottery works/bead works. We did the bead works rather than the pottery and it was SO fun! The whole room was literally FULL of beads, every kind you could imagine. You just go around and pick the beads you want, keeping track of the pricing. (most on average ranged from .10 to .70 cents.) We spent so long picking out the beads because there were so many to choose from! We each made a couple watch bands and the lady showed us how to finish them off. We're pretty basically bead experts at this point. ;)

Later in the day I also got to hang out with my roommate from last year, Kasey. It was a good time. We had dinner here, went to the mall/Walmart, made brownies, played some DEAL, and watched a movie. :) I'd say we were very successful.

So that was my Saturday. I just couldn't wait to write about God and His goodness!
On a whole other note, I memorized my verse, and I was thinking about it more, and realized how LAME I was for thinking I could only do one verse for January. So I decided I will do TWO even though I'm jumping on a little late. I'll pick my other verse at some point today and put that on up there. :)

Fill-in-the-blank Friday

Today was a TWO-HOUR DELAY and it was the best day ever!! :) It made the day fly by and it felt even more wonderful because it's a Friday! Woohoo.

I'm currently LOVING student teaching =) We'll see how I feel once all the "dirty work" starts and I'm up to my neck in lesson plans..;)

Today I wanted to do a "fill-in-the-blank Friday" because they seem fun.

Also random note: I read on someone else's blog that they are doing this thing where they are memorizing 2 verses every month, for the year. Since I'm jumping on the boat kind of late I'm going to start with one for the month of January and then start with two in February. I'm excited about it! I'm adding a tab at the top of my blog that will list my memory verses. :) Whoever reads this, feel free to join and do the same!
Okay now on to "fill-in-the-blank Friday"



1. My favorite quote is... I have many...but here's two "There is no comfort in the growth zone and no growth in the comfort zone."

"We can do no great things, just small things with great love. It is not how much you do, but how much love you put into doing it."
Mother Teresa

2. A bad habit I have is... procrastinating!

3. The first time I felt like a "grown up" was... probably when I started living in a house at college rather than a dorm, or when I started filling out my application for a real person job..!

4. Weekends are... Completely amazing and time to relax and take a breather from real life. Also time for sleeping in!! :)

5. When I was little I wished my named was... I think I used to want my name to be Julie... but in general I've always liked my name!

6. I wish... the world was in a happier state instead of progressively getting worse. It saddens my heart..

7. A secret I have is... I actually like a "little" change sometimes.. I know *shocker*

Have a lovely weekend!!

Day 2

So I'm sitting here thinking about what I should I do.. Take a nap..? That sounds good! Eat dinner..? hmm yeah maybe... wait! I guess I should blog.. *sigh*

=) That was my thought process just now.

So day TWO of student teacher was completed today. I'm rollin' now! ;)

It's been a GREAT start. I am in utter, and complete awe of God and what He is doing in my life right now. I have had no attacks of any kind while in 1st grade and it's been such a major blessing!!
It was kind of ironic because last night at caregroup I shared about my taking medication and what a struggle it was, and how blessed I've been not to have any side effects. And then of course, last night (or early this morning rather, around 4am) I woke up having a panic attack. Not nearly as bad as the really scary one from before, but a little weird none the less. I felt the weird heat thing flaring up a bit, and my heart started to race a little, but I called out to God and He helped me to remain as calm as possible in the midst of it. I started to feel really weird tension in my muscles and like I couldn't relax them, and just the need to move my legs. It was WEIRD. Thankfully it didn't last too long and I was able to relax a bit until 6am when my alarm went off. I WAS feeling pretty nervous though to go to school. It was the first time to really have those feelings since I started my new medicine and I didn't want anything to happen at school. I texted one of my bffs and she reminded me to trust God, and just let go of my control of the situation. It was a WONDERFUL reminder and I totally was like "God, you're right, and I give you the control, it's yours" at that, I felt SUCH a peace like none other. I knew that no matter what happened God was on my side and He would take care of me.

This day ended up going SO WELL! It was such a good day. I felt much less awkward around other staff and people, and more comfortable with the kiddos.

I'm also pretty stoked about this snow coming our way tonight! (fingers crossed for at least a 2-hr delay:))

I over heard one little girl today telling my teacher "I'm glad Miss Shaffer is here with us.." and my teacher said "yeah me too" =)

I'm glad to be there with them, here in this moment God has called me to!!

Philippians 3:10

I usually don't just post scripture but this verse is really sticking out to me today. I love it in the amplified version. :)

Philippians 3:10-11

10[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [[a]which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope]

11That if possible I may attain to the [[b]spiritual and moral] resurrection [that lifts me] out from among the dead [even while in the body].

It's another snowy/icy day!

Everything is better with God

Welp, It's almost that time again. Time to go back to school.

I'm sort of dreading it, as usual.

I LOVE it when I'm there, but I just love home so much, I get so attached to being here after four weeks. I know I'll be homesick at first and I'm not looking forward to it.:(

Plus, it's my LAST semester as an UNDERGRAD!! That's CRAZY!

I'm sort of really nervous to go back. =/ Because of what happened a week or so ago when I was there..(the meds) I'm much more afraid to leave home. What if something happens..?

I'm learning in this time more than ever that I NEED to lean on God. I sort of feel like I'm at the end of my rope, and it's all I can do.
I'm so scared.
There is so much stuff I'm going to be responsible for with student teaching, and I just want to feel OKAY, and like my happy, normal, self.
I NEED to find my strength in God, and not myself. I know He is trying to teach me that I will be okay if I seek Him out when I'm scared or feeling sick from the medicine. When I call out to Him to comfort me, He will give me the peace I need to get through. I'm fully trusting God for what will happen in these next few weeks. It's all I can do really.

I would really appreciate prayers as I go back to school and get back into "the swing of things"! That I will lean on God, and call out to Him rather than worrying about panic attacks.


Yesterday and today I read Luke 2.
Jesus is born, and then He is a boy around the age of 12.

I really liked the verse in the first half about the shepherds:

8And in that vicinity there were shepherds living [out under the open sky] in the field, watching [in shifts] over their flock by night

I like it a lot because God is OUR shepherd, and we are His sheep. The shepherds watched over their flocks by night, it says. It just reminded me that God is always, always watching out for us. Even by night. =)

The second half of Luke talks about a story of Jesus I don't think I've ever heard before, which I thought was odd.
Jesus and his parents go to Jerusalem and then his parents go back but He remains behind. His parents though didn't know. It says they were worried sick, they didn't know where He was. Finally they went back to Jerusalem and found Him with the teachers asking questions, and it says people were astonished by His intelligence.
They ask Jesus how He could treat them that way.. and He replies with:

"How is it that you had to look for me? Did you not see and know that it is necessary for me to be in My Father's house?"
but they didn't understand Him.

I thought it was cool that that sort of thing was already happening at the age of 12!
:)

Wishing everyone a fabulous weekend!

Luke 1 con.. and grown up talk.

Today I read the last half of Luke chapter 1.(v. 56-80) I'm kind of ashamed of how long it took me to finish chapter 1, but I have definitely been side tracked.

I got a lot out of the reading.
In the beginning part of what I read, John was born and the people (neighbors and relatives) thought Elizabeth would name the baby Zachariah after his father. She told them she would name him John. (bc that is what God told them to do) but the people seemed so confused and just didn't understand.
This reminded me of how sometimes things God calls us to seem out of the ordinary, or not what we are used to. People might look at us, or question us, but we need to follow through with what we hear God calling us to, regardless. This is what Elizabeth and Zachariah did and Zachariah's mouth was opened again as a result!!

I really especially loved the last few verses.

78Because of and through the heart of tender mercy and loving-kindness of our God, a Light from on high will dawn upon us and visit [us](D)

79To shine upon and give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to direct and guide our feet in a straight line into the way of peace.(E)

=)

Other than that I wrote up my "letter of interest" today!

I've been wanting to get everything set to go on PA-educator (an online application for teachers) before student teaching starts up, that way I won't have to worry about it later.

So..letter of interest, check. It was very difficult to know what to write! It's one thing to just write it, but I want to impress them so they want to interview me. I also want to be myself, so I tried to do both.

I still need to write up my essay. That will hopefully happen later this week.

It's an exciting time but also scary, and I'm having a hard time believing I'm old enough to be at this place right now..! It's crazy, I tell you.

Bring on the SNOW!!!

=)

I LOVE this!

Heard this for the first time to today and I think it's awesome! :) I love the lyrics, so I had to post it here. =)

Happy Sunday!

No Sweeter Name

I have to start out by saying this past week was, by far, the longest week of my entire life. (was it really only LAST weekend that I was in Lancaster for New Years?! It seems like an eternity!!)

I've been through so much this week. I've been more scared than I've ever been in my life, but God has been TOTALLY 100 percent faithful and right by my side!

I started my medication last Sunday, took it for three days and then realized it was not reacting well with my body. I ended up taking it for only three days. The first two days were fine, basically no major side effects besides a little dizziness, and nausea, but not bad at all. I took a trip to school on that third day not thinking anything of it. I was with a bunch of friends who I know but who I don't normally hang out with to see Shane Claiborne speak. (no big deal...) Well it turns out I got some really, REALLY bad, scary panic attacks while there. Worse than ever before. It's so difficult to put into words for people who haven't ever experienced it. Basically I felt like passing out, and like I would throw up...and then I felt intense heat, all over my body like I was on fire. I was so scared. I got home later that night and felt better. I talked to a good friend who reassured me that those feelings were coming from the meds because my body was adjusting.

That night I was able to fall asleep but I woke up suddenly at 3am and felt REALLY weird. I just felt terrified and scared for no reason. My heart was going a little faster and then I got really scared.. I had another really bad panic episode but worse than that night. My heart was racing, my whole body was on fire, and I felt that same passing out/nauseous feeling. I was so scared because I was in the house by myself at school, an hour and a half from home. It was intense and it took a few minutes to pass. I felt like I was dying! I almost called 911, I didn't know what to do..but then it finally subsided.

That morning I called my doctors office and told them I didn't want to keeping taking these meds, and they told me to stop with that one and my doctor prescribed this other medication called Celexa.
I gave myself a few days before starting the new one to let the Zoloft leave my system a bit. Let me just tell you, it was like nothing I've ever experienced. By God's amazing help I was able to drive myself home that next day, but it wasn't easy. I still felt so anxious and jittery. That night I can't even explain how I felt. Just scared beyond belief and not like myself at all. I guess I could describe it as a feeling like something is very wrong that would make me nervous when in reality everything's okay. I know it was because of the medicine though..and because I hadn't taken it that day.

So far, so good with this new medicine. It's a lower dose and it also doesn't have the same half life of zoloft if I were to stop it.

Like I said though, there is no way I could do this without God! He has been so completely amazing and with me every step of the way. He's shown me verses in the Bible that have brought so much comfort, and also just brought scripture to mind when I felt afraid. He's given me a few little signs that make me smile and remind me that He's with me and still holding me. I'm SO thankful for what He's doing.

Here's one of the verses He showed me:
"My Father...is greater and mightier than all else; and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand." John 10:29

God reminded me through this that He is BIGGER and MIGHTIER than all of this!
He is MIGHTIER than my fear. He is mightier than my anxiety. He is mightier than this medicine. He is mightier than my doctor. Mightier than my side effects... Mightier than the panic attacks.. Mightier than ALL ELSE!!! And He will help me through it, because He is bigger and stronger than anything I'm going through or feeling, even in this situation. :) It makes my heart so happy!

Another few verses that really helped me were from Isaiah 43. It was AWESOME because the night I spent at home after the really scary night, I still kept waking up and feeling afraid, but I started to pray and instantly these verses just came to my mind. (From God!)
"Fear not, I have called you by name, you are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers they will not overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire you will not be burned.."

It was AMAZING!! I felt such a calm come over me just knowing that God was with me through this rough time.

I'm just so, so incredibly thankful. I know God is guiding me. Maybe there was a reason (I'm sure there is..) why I had to go through that, and why I'm still going through it. All I know is that I'm trusting God and fully leaning on Him in this. (and everything!) It's amazing how He comes through in our weaknesses!

I listened to the song Never Alone this morning by Jim Brickman and the lyrics really comforted me. :)

Here is the chorus from it:

Never alone
Never alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart
When you face the unknown
Wherever you fly
This isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby you're never alone

Beginning of Luke

So in my last post I wrote a few "resolution" type goals for myself for this new year (2011!!!). They all look really good in writing, and they are all things I desire to do/grow in SO very much. but I was thinking about them more on Sunday morning and I realized those are things that will take effort and some change on my part. I can say those things and it's all well and good, but I can't just keep living the same way and expect those things to change on their own. What's the point of writing them down just to forget them? So I'm going to try to be really conscious of them. Some of them are also things I need God's help with. They also go hand in hand, for example by staying in God's word and praying often, I will be able to love on people more naturally. That seems to be how it works out. Find yourself in God, and everything else clicks in place.

SO anyway, that said, I decided that I should pick a book of the Bible to start reading in. I have a daily devotional, which I LOVE, but I feel the need for something else to go with it. I decided to start in Luke. I read part of chapter 1 today (1-55). I was really interested in the fact that the gospel, Luke is sort of connected with the book of Acts! My Bible has notes in the beginning of the chapters and it also said that Luke is "noted for his interest in various classes of people"...I thought that was cool. Apparently in his account there are details about women and children that aren't in the other gospels simply because he noticed them. I like that.

In the verses that I just read Luke is writing about Zachariah, Elizabeth, and Mary.
Zachariah and Elizabeth couldn't have children for years and years. An angel comes to Zechariah and tells him that Elizabeth will have a child. The verses that stuck out to me from this part were 11-13.

11And there appeared to him an angel of the Lord, standing at the right side of the altar of incense.

12And when Zachariah saw him, he was troubled, and fear took possession of him.

13But the angel said to him, Do not be afraid, Zachariah, because your petition [k]was heard, and your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you must call his name John [God is favorable].


Zachariah saw the angel and was afraid. The angel tells him about his son to be named John and Zachariah doubts him, as a result of this his voice is taken away.
A similar thing happens to Mary when angel Gabriel came to her. She was also afraid...

28And he came to her and said, Hail, O favored one [[w]endued with grace]! The Lord is with you! [x]Blessed (favored of God) are you before all other women!

29But when she saw him, she was greatly troubled and disturbed and confused at what he said and kept revolving in her mind what such a greeting might mean.

The angel said to Mary "the Lord is with you" "Blessed are you!" and still she became afraid at what he was saying. She was "greatly troubled" and it says that she kept turning over in her mind what the angel might be telling her.

I was thinking about how often this happens in my own mind..and how much I can relate to those statements. There are so many times when I've gotten unnecessarily afraid or stuck with fear, or had doubts...
At first I thought it was ironic that Zachariah and Mary become afraid because it's an angel that confronts them...it seems like it would be a comfort, but after thinking about it more, I understand why they might be struck with fear upon seeing an angel.

After Mary becomes afraid, her attitude does a 180 and she begins to rejoice God. I liked this a lot too. :)

46And Mary said, My soul magnifies and extols the Lord,

47And my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,

48For He has looked upon the low station and humiliation of His handmaiden. For behold, from now on all generations [of all ages] will call me blessed and declare me happy and [aa]to be envied!

49For He Who is almighty has done great things for me--and holy is His name [to be venerated in His purity, majesty and glory]!



Happy Monday!