Bitter sweet

I have a lot on my mind right now.

There are so many scattered thoughts just swimming around in this brain of my mine right now and I'm blogging to sort through them...or attempt to anyway.

This week at school is over for me. Tomorrow student teachers have this mandatory interviewing seminar so we have to go to that. It's in the morning and then IF we have a second placement (which I do) we meet with our new supervisor in the afternoon some time.

Next week is my LAST week student teaching in 1st grade. =/ It's going to be so sad come next Friday. My teacher told the students that I wouldn't be there tomorrow because of this thing tomorrow and a bunch of them came and gave me hugs..haa and they were like I don't want you to leave. ughh...I might cry. hah.

At the same time, I was SO beyond THRILLED for this week to be over because now I'm done teaching in that room. Like I said, some of those behaviors were a lot to handle and felt like too much at times...mehh. idk. Next week I'll just be meeting one on one with kiddos and doing things for my teacher. It will be a nice transition time.

Honestly, I'm very surprised to say that I'm looking forward to my next placement. (??!?) I can't believe it. I don't know where on earth these feelings are coming from but they are there. Let me just tell you, when I found out my placements in Novemebr and I realized this second placement was in 6th grade and that it was MIDDLE school style- I was not happy. (to say the least)

Okay....honesty hour.
I was crying. hah. Yeah. I did that. I even emailed the placement office and asked if they could please switch me.
They said no. (my cert is from K-6 so it is a valid placement blah blah)

but ANYWAY-now I'm happy about it!! The school is all 6th grade. It should be a very interesting experience and I'm really looking forward to it.

So yes, I'm very sad to leave first grade and my SUPER AMAZING coop, but I am excited for this new placement. Having just one really does get old. I can't really imagine being there until May.

So that's that.

I'm super, pumped for this weekend! I'm getting to see (hopefully) two of best friends :) :)
I'm stoked. SO so so stoked.
I haven't seen both in a while and it'll be oh so sweet to catch up and laugh and have fun with each of them.

I'm still so in awe of God.

I haven't gotten as much time with Him this week as I did last week. :( But besides that I still feel joy and peace and just...settled.

Today my supervisor came to observe my math lesson and I was nervous. She emailed me my mid-placement evaluation (which was DUE on Feb 14 *ahem*) and I saw that it wasn't too great. or kind. So I wasn't excited about her coming. God totally reassured my heart though. He just reminded me that it doesn't matter what she thinks really. Ultimately I find my worth in God and others' judgements don't make me or change who I am as a person.

I can do ANYTHING in God. Think about that statement. Really think about it.
It doesn't matter if I mess up. Tomorrow is always a new day I can keep striving to be my best. Every day. And every. single. day. God is WITH me. Helping me. and bringing me comfort, joy, peace, love and SO much moreee. :)

Time goes too fast. It makes me kind of sad and mixed up..=/ It's GOOD. but mehh, it's scary and I want time to slow down.

sighh... hope everyone had a fabulous Thursday!