Welp, It's almost that time again. Time to go back to school.
I'm sort of dreading it, as usual.
I LOVE it when I'm there, but I just love home so much, I get so attached to being here after four weeks. I know I'll be homesick at first and I'm not looking forward to it.:(
Plus, it's my LAST semester as an UNDERGRAD!! That's CRAZY!
I'm sort of really nervous to go back. =/ Because of what happened a week or so ago when I was there..(the meds) I'm much more afraid to leave home. What if something happens..?
I'm learning in this time more than ever that I NEED to lean on God. I sort of feel like I'm at the end of my rope, and it's all I can do.
I'm so scared.
There is so much stuff I'm going to be responsible for with student teaching, and I just want to feel OKAY, and like my happy, normal, self.
I NEED to find my strength in God, and not myself. I know He is trying to teach me that I will be okay if I seek Him out when I'm scared or feeling sick from the medicine. When I call out to Him to comfort me, He will give me the peace I need to get through. I'm fully trusting God for what will happen in these next few weeks. It's all I can do really.
I would really appreciate prayers as I go back to school and get back into "the swing of things"! That I will lean on God, and call out to Him rather than worrying about panic attacks.
Yesterday and today I read Luke 2.
Jesus is born, and then He is a boy around the age of 12.
I really liked the verse in the first half about the shepherds:
8And in that vicinity there were shepherds living [out under the open sky] in the field, watching [in shifts] over their flock by night
I like it a lot because God is OUR shepherd, and we are His sheep. The shepherds watched over their flocks by night, it says. It just reminded me that God is always, always watching out for us. Even by night. =)
The second half of Luke talks about a story of Jesus I don't think I've ever heard before, which I thought was odd.
Jesus and his parents go to Jerusalem and then his parents go back but He remains behind. His parents though didn't know. It says they were worried sick, they didn't know where He was. Finally they went back to Jerusalem and found Him with the teachers asking questions, and it says people were astonished by His intelligence.
They ask Jesus how He could treat them that way.. and He replies with:
"How is it that you had to look for me? Did you not see and know that it is necessary for me to be in My Father's house?"
but they didn't understand Him.
I thought it was cool that that sort of thing was already happening at the age of 12!
:)
Wishing everyone a fabulous weekend!
I am going to pray for you girl. I know the unsettling feeling of anxiety. It's horrible. There was a time in my life that I experienced worse than ever, and I finally begged God to give me a scripture to focus on instead of my anxiety. He did, and I focused on that scripture for 21 days, all day, and after the 21 my anxiety was gone. I still struggle with it here and there, but nothing like I did in that particular time in my life. God will be with you, ask Him to help you, as I know you have, and He will. He will never leave you or forsake you.
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